Candy Dreams

This has been on my mind for a while. Ever since it happened the first time... I don't really know how to describe it--what it means to me. I know how I feel about it, that much is certain. But where will I end up if this kind of thing continues? Is it healthy? I feel as the hungry man who dreameth, and, behold, he eateth; but he awaketh, and his soul is empty: or as when a thirsty man dreameth, and, behold, he drinketh; but he awaketh, and, behold, he is faint, and his soul hath appetite.

It's been over two months, and I can't let go of my regret, sharp and bitter. Why didn't I visit the Jelly Belly factory when I was in San Francisco?

I bought a bag at an outlet store. Five dollars for two pounds. But there were only a dozen flavors, and none of my favorites. I haven't even finished the bag. It's like a cruel joke.

I went to a wedding about a month ago, and Jelly Bellies were handed out as party favors. It was like living out a fantasy--but it only lasted the night. They were gone so quickly...

And so my fevered brain resorts to the dream world in a vain attempt to sate the exquisite hunger for those perfect little candies.

I am in a store... I see shelf upon shelf of Jelly Bellies...there are so many flavors...every flavor... They are on sale--what joy! ... I agonize over what to buy, which are my favorite, which will go best together? ... I choose carefully, conscious of my finances, prudent as always... But there are so many! And so many sales! ... I have chosen, I have bags...filled with the perfect selections... I still cannot believe my fortune...

And then I wake up.